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Document Review - Jd & Attorney

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We are currently seeking licensed attorneys for upcoming projects that will likely never materialize. Email me : To qualify, you must meet the following requirements: -- Be licensed to practice law; -- Have no spine because you will be working in substandard conditions; -- Place little value on your skills because you will not receive a fair wage; -- Be willing to work at the whim of the client, including on holidays, with all OT to be paid at a flat rate; -- Consider Flavia, donuts, bagels, and pizza fringe benefits; -- Submit to an extensive and worthwhile conflicts check and body cavity search because we understand that you possess top secret company information from past clients, and we know that you remember all of it; -- Have previously worked on or applied to Richmond projects that pay $21/hr-$25/hr; and -- Lack the self-esteem to tell agencies that you won't work for below market rate. The review center will be open from 8am-7pm, M-F. There is a 40 hour minimum per week, but there is No Max. If you read "No Max" to mean that you can bill unlimited hours or more than 52.5 hours, you are truly special and we will consider paying you (shock!) $22 an hour. TOTAL. Even for overtime. $22 an hour. And that's before taxes. If you satisfy the above requirements, tape a sign on your forehead that reads "LOSER" and email me your resume at : Stop working on these projects that refuse to pay a fair wage! And if your personal circumstances leave you with no option but to accept these horrific projects, think about providing the level of service for which you are paid . For your line of work, anything under $35 (which is what we pay for JD candidates here in Charlotte) is an insult. DID YOU REALLY GO TO 3 YEARS OF LAW SCHOOL, WASTE AN ENTIRE SUMMER STUDYING FOR THE BAR & SUBJECT YOURSELF TO INTENSE SCRUTINY TO BE TREATED LIKE A RODENT?! And paid LESS than what a high school dropout paralegal in NYC makes per hour?! Standard, quality services should start at $35. Premium services, such as redactions and privilege logging, should start at $40 an hour with ANY bar license. Period. If you're afraid that the law firms will send the work offshore, have no fear. The firms tried that already, and the work product they received was a disaster. Have you ever placed a call with customer care for a company that outsources customer care calls offshore? Well, imagine that incomprehensible "law graduate" communicating in any way to a law firm - about privilege, responsiveness and the parol evidence rule (and you thought AT&T's customer service was bad?!) The law firms need you - you don't need them. But, hey, if you want me to profit while you suffer, email me at : Thanks for being stupid, unmotivated LOSERS who don't mind me - and my firm, HireCounsel - making money hand over fist while we pay you THE SAME WAGE A BURGER KING MANAGER WITH NO G.E.D. MAKES! Mmmm - burgers. My fat ass got hungry. Whopper with cheese coming up. Hey, it's better than the whopper of a lie I'm selling you that this project will last for months (only a few weeks, to be honest) and will "move you up in our company quickly" (all lies!)

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